Extreme Card Games
Ok I want to tell the Bearded Wedding Story, but it really would be told best with visuals. So anyone out there who knows how to post pictures... drop me a line (if I knew how to link e-mail's I would do that too.) andicandi@juno.com
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So instead I will enlighten you on the dangers of playing spoons.
First the rules of spoons:
1. The object of the game is to get 4 of the same cards. 4 of the same number or face cards. You pass cards around until you get 4 of a kind. Normally there isn't a whole lot of structure to this part... just cards getting thrown around.
2. Ok, so I lied. The real object of the game isn't to get 4 of a kind. You really just want to get a spoon after someone else gets 4 of a kind. Since there is one less spoon than people... fights are encouraged.
3. It is extremely important to put the spoons, not in the middle of the people playing, that's how pansies play spoons, but at a distant location. Up-stairs, down the hall, in an elevator, outside, etc... are good locations. This way everyone will have to work for their spoon. Hey life is hard - suck it up. Once again... fights are encouraged.
4. If you don't get a spoon - you get a letter. As soon as you spell S-P-O-O-N-S you are out and get to take a complimentary spoon with you. Depending on the arrangements, you may have to give the spoon back. If it's a nice spoon I would recommend slipping it in your bag and "forgetting" about it until you get home. Wash it before using it - it may have touched someone's foot.
Spoons should be played only by extremely bored and slap-happy people. Or I guess drunk people could play too... but that's up to them. This way any physical harm that is incurred will only be seen has roll-on-the-floor-laughing funny, and not actually harmful.
Example: .....laughter.....breathe...."Did you see Joe fall down....hehehehe... the stairs?.... that's freakin' hilarious".... breathe....
(Joe would laugh, but his cracked ribs make it too painful)
I was playing spoons one time and the spoons had been strategically placed at the top of the stairs. I finally got 4 of a kind and jumped up to race after my spoon, when someone grabbed my ankle. I spun around to get free. Apparently my elbow decided to take it's time in turning around. Stupid elbow. It managed to appear just in time to pop Ryan in the nose.
That guy is a superb Spoons player. He made it to the top of the stairs, got a spoon and didn't get any blood on the carpet. You are my hero Ryan.
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Check out Hoover's Blog. It's probably the funniest thing I have ever read.
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So instead I will enlighten you on the dangers of playing spoons.
First the rules of spoons:
1. The object of the game is to get 4 of the same cards. 4 of the same number or face cards. You pass cards around until you get 4 of a kind. Normally there isn't a whole lot of structure to this part... just cards getting thrown around.
2. Ok, so I lied. The real object of the game isn't to get 4 of a kind. You really just want to get a spoon after someone else gets 4 of a kind. Since there is one less spoon than people... fights are encouraged.
3. It is extremely important to put the spoons, not in the middle of the people playing, that's how pansies play spoons, but at a distant location. Up-stairs, down the hall, in an elevator, outside, etc... are good locations. This way everyone will have to work for their spoon. Hey life is hard - suck it up. Once again... fights are encouraged.
4. If you don't get a spoon - you get a letter. As soon as you spell S-P-O-O-N-S you are out and get to take a complimentary spoon with you. Depending on the arrangements, you may have to give the spoon back. If it's a nice spoon I would recommend slipping it in your bag and "forgetting" about it until you get home. Wash it before using it - it may have touched someone's foot.
Spoons should be played only by extremely bored and slap-happy people. Or I guess drunk people could play too... but that's up to them. This way any physical harm that is incurred will only be seen has roll-on-the-floor-laughing funny, and not actually harmful.
Example: .....laughter.....breathe...."Did you see Joe fall down....hehehehe... the stairs?.... that's freakin' hilarious".... breathe....
(Joe would laugh, but his cracked ribs make it too painful)
I was playing spoons one time and the spoons had been strategically placed at the top of the stairs. I finally got 4 of a kind and jumped up to race after my spoon, when someone grabbed my ankle. I spun around to get free. Apparently my elbow decided to take it's time in turning around. Stupid elbow. It managed to appear just in time to pop Ryan in the nose.
That guy is a superb Spoons player. He made it to the top of the stairs, got a spoon and didn't get any blood on the carpet. You are my hero Ryan.
********
Check out Hoover's Blog. It's probably the funniest thing I have ever read.
posted by Andi at
5:50 PM
